Silver Lining

I’ve been sick for the past three days. I’ve spent the last two days sitting on the couch only getting up out of necessity but when the sun came out this morning, I felt it was necessary to get outside. Nearly 70 degrees and sunshine was our reward today for a February filled with snow. My body didn’t ache this morning. My head didn’t hurt, so I headed to the trails with one intention: mindfulness.

As much as my head and my heart wanted to run, I wanted to remain mindful of my body. I ran slowly along my favorite trails. I stopped and enjoyed my surroundings when I didn’t have energy to keep going. As I enjoyed the simplicity of moving my body in the sunshine, my brain wandered to race day. What would Shamrock 2015 deliver?

Every thought lead to one conclusion. I can’t be disappointed when I haven’t put in the time or the effort this season. No matter what happens, I’ll find my silver lining. That’s what I do best.

I left my run feeling like a polished version of myself. The silver lining of today’s run wasn’t hard to find. The simple beauty of nature is always enough for me.

Post run I shared a few texts with a friend, the friend who is responsible for motivating me to sign up for my first race. The beauty of friendships that have existed since high school is the friend’s ability to know all aspects of my life. She’s known me through every life transition so when she starts a text with “I mean this very kindly,” I know the rest of the message is one I need to hear.

“And I mean this very kindly. I’ve never known you to trust/be content with your training and you always still have fun on race day and perform great!! I’m sure you’ll be fine!! 🙂 two weeks!!!!”

Her timing was brilliant, and her words were accurate. I’m always wanting more. I always think I could have given more. Yes, I always find a silver lining but why can’t I embrace an entire suit of silver. Why don’t I wear silver on the outside?

The truth is I have trained for Shamrock. I haven’t followed a training plan. I haven’t had consistent speed workouts or tempo runs. I haven’t stressed over my nutrition or my recovery. But that was my intention for this race. My intention for running is to thrive.

For everything I didn’t do, I also never had a bad run. I never finished a run feeling disappoint. I never sacrificed family time or work priorities. Every single run was a gift.

I’m more than ready for this race – no silver lining needed.