Starting to get a little crazy

We are definitely back to reality in our house. Cole’s home. Spring break is over. And Cole starts swim lessons tonight. Whenever we add another element to our normal daily routine, I always find myself getting anxious.  I like routine. I like having a plan. In the past, I would normally throw my hands up, give up something I love, and toss dinner plans out the window.  We would normally just pick up Chickfila on the way home.  Not anymore.  I’m reminding myself to breath, relaxing my brain, and reorganizing our nightly routine. Seriously – It is only 50 mins of swimming twice a week.  I can handle that.  Cole will be swimming for the next 8 weeks on Mondays and Wednesdays from 5:30 to 6:20.  I know families juggle so much more than swim lessons twice a week. I’m envious of those who can get it all done. There are a few thing I won’t do though – sacrifice family dinner time, give up my training, or ask Christian to drop all of his hobbies.

In order to keep my brain relaxed and open, I need to find a balance for cooking dinner at home, getting Cole to swim on time, my training plan, time for yoga with Christian, nightly meditation, homework, and just some good family fun time (all after 4:30pm and before 8:00pm bedtime).

Tonight’s plan – Christian has offered to stay home from swim so he can be responsible for dinner (Love my husband!).  While Cole is swimming, I’m going to take advantage of working at the rec center. I’m going to get a little bit of extra work done and I’m going to walk 20 minutes on the treadmill – if one is available.  Then Dinner, hang-out time, bedtime for Cole. After Cole’s in bed, the husband and I have a date with our yoga mats followed by some evening meditation. Bedtime by 10pm for us old folks.

Parenting is definitely a hard balance between sacrificing everything for your children and selfishly keeping everything for yourself.  I struggle with both constantly, and I tend to go extreme on either end.  I need both running and yoga in my life, and I want Cole to have the same passion about something. After our Shamrock final-mile disaster, Cole, Christian and I had a long talk about Cole finding something he loves – drawing, running, basketball, swimming – I don’t care what it is, but I want him to feel proud of himself.  He told us that he really loves swimming. In fact, according to Cole, he loves swimming so much that he might have gills on his skin. Cole is a good swimmer under the water, but now he is ready to tackle learning to swim on top of the water.

Can Cole complete my 40 day goal challenge for me? While he is ready to jump feet first into “swimming on top of the water”, I have my feet firmly planted on the pool deck.  Looks like I’ve got some things to learn from my cute child with gills on his skin!

In order to move forward and literally get my feet wet, I need to explore what is holding me back. I know once I jump in, I’ll be fine. I know how to swim. I think I’m mostly embarrassed to swim laps for the first time.  I have no knowledge on how to properly swim the breast stroke (is that what it is called?). I really don’t want to look like an idiot. Similar to Cole, I’m uncomfortable with the thought of having an audience.  Let’s be honest though, who is going to be watching? The lifeguard? I just need to do it! I’m going to use the next few days to do some research and then I’m going swimming. Next Wednesday on my training plan is a free exercise day for me. I had planned on cycling, but I think the pool is calling my name. If I don’t get over this silly fear of mine now, I will never do it.  I’m using up too much energy thinking about when I’m going to swim. I just need to do it.  I’m putting it out there – I will swim laps next Wednesday (May 4th). If you are a swimmer, please send me words of encouragement, tips, etc. I need it! I might even take notes during Cole’s swim lessons.