and Breathe….

My 5th cycle of 40 day goals has come and gone without me evening noticing. The last day of this cycle was October 1st. It’s October 5th. I guess I needed 5 more days to ponder over goals.

Keeping up with goals and pregnancy is tough. The big goal of having a baby takes priority over everything. It’s become increasingly hard for me to set plans for the weekend at the begin of the week because I really do not know what my body will require of me on any given day. Some days I feel great. Other days I feel like a walking zombie. I’m constantly struggle with taking it one day at a time and planning out the next 12 weeks of my pregnancy. On good days, I plan for the 12 weeks. On not so good days, I remind myself to take it one day at a time. So far it is working for me. I’m not challenging myself to grow and become better (not exactly), but I’m challenging myself by growing a baby. This entire journey has made me a better person.  Right now that is enough for me.

How did I do this time around?

Set #5 (August 23rd – October 1st ish)

1. Paint Mister Moo’s Room – DONE!

2. Run the Rock n Roll half-marathon and enjoy the race – DONE!

3. Furniture Shop (craigs list, antique stores, yard sales etc) – Pie Cabinet for front room (office stuff), Dresser (Mister Moo’s Room) – This is so much harder than I expected. I look on a daily basis. I just haven’t found “it” yet…at least not in my price range.

4. Submit paperwork to renew teaching licenses – Waiting to hear back on official name change paper work. Then I can submit my renewal forms.

5. Read a book (for fun!) – Cole and I have started reading a chapter book together at night-time. This counts, right? We are currently reading The Fire Within.  It is a wonderfully written book about dragons and squirrels and a quirky little family. I believe there are 6 or 7 in the series. We are both hooked and will be reading them all.

6. Read The Bradley Method book – I’ve bought it. I’ve read the intro.

7. Sign up for a labor/delivery class – DONE! First class starts tonight!

8. Curtain Projects – Living Room and Mister Moo’s Room After painting Chet’s bedroom, I realized I do like the curtains that are in his room. No need for new ones!!!! I’m still on the search for the perfect affordable fabric for the living room.

9. Camp with Cole (possibly September, maybe October) – Not yet

10. Date night with Christian – DONE! TWICE! Pizza night and The Avett Brothers’ concert

11. Register for Mister Moo – DONE! thank goodness since we already had the baby shower

12. Come up with post half-marathon running plans AND post-Mister Moo running plans – post half-marathon plan DONE! post Mister Moo plans are still up for debate.

Not to shabby for a pregnant lady.

Now that I’m in my third trimester, I’ve decided to take a break from the 40 day goal challenges. My focus right now needs to be about taking care of myself and preparing for the baby, the holidays, and child-birth. I feel like I have everything in place so this can be my focus over the next 11+ weeks.  I give credit to these goal challenges for keeping me focused so I could get to this point. Although I’m taking a mini break right now, the challenge will be coming back in full force post baby.

The rest of 2011 is all about nurturing.

Some people think it’s holding that makes one strong—sometimes it’s letting go. -Unknown

For the first time ever, I’m consciously making the choice let go of control for the next 11 weeks.  This, in and of itself, is a HUGE challenge for me. I’m a planner to my core. I tend to grab on to anything when I feel like I’ve lost control. I think it is time for me to learn that I’ll be okay without a plan, without a mountain to conquer, or without a battle to win. For the next 11 weeks, I’m challenging myself to be okay with just being….

If I can keep myself quiet, my body will let me know what it needs. My mind will tell me where it needs to go. My emotions will let me know when I need something more. I’m trusting myself.

Don’t seek, don’t search, don’t ask, don’t knock, don’t demand – relax. If you relax, it comes. If you relax, it is there. If you relax, you start vibrating with it. ~Osho

I feel confident that I have a strong foundation. I feel confident that my body and my mind knows what it needs. If my body wants to run, I will run. If it wants to walk, I will walk. If I feel like nourishing my body with veggies and quinoa, I will. I will not shy away from the oh so yummy chocolate chip cookies. If my body needs a nap, I will take one. If I feel good staying active all day, you know I will be outside. My plan to let go isn’t about making excuses to be lazy. It’s about giving my body exactly what it needs on any given day.

This is not something that come natural to me. I’m hoping my family, my friends and my blog will keep me accountable. If you catch me over thinking, over planning, or creating a spread sheet for who knows what, please remind me to breathe.