I’ve had a few days to digest all the changes that are going on in Chet’s life. How did we get here? How is he not a newborn baby anymore?While he is growing and changing, my brain had not adapted to the reality of Chet’s current life needs. I can not believe we are at the stage in his life where I’m looking up baby food recipes online.
While I desperately want to crawl back to the times of long naps with a baby sleeping on my chest, showers every 3 days, and nightly pacing around the house with a crying baby, I know Chet isn’t moving backwards. I have to live now or when he is one I am going to want to reverse time to the point where I’m introducing foods and he is loving sleeping on his belly.
My body is responding to the extra pumping I’ve been doing all week. I’m setting manageable goals for breast-feeding. Goal #1 – Pump every 3 hours no matter what. Goal #2 – Focus on one month at a time. I know his wants and needs will change as real foods become a part of his life. If I can focus on this month, right now, it doesn’t feel so overwhelming. Right now I want to make it to six months exclusively breast-feeding. Yes. My life will revolve around pumping and breast-feeding for the next month, but I am embracing it. It means that much to me.
Tonight Chet was introduced to the wonderful world of sweet potatoes. I hadn’t planned on making this his first food. I wasn’t even planning on giving him food tonight. We were having sweet potatoes with our dinner, and Chet wanted them. I mashed up a small amount in a bowl, and we played. I feed him with my finger. He feed himself with his hands. His toes got in on the fun too. I made about a teaspoon size amount for him. Who knows how much made it into his mouth. It was absolutely wonderful watching him discover something new. We will continue to play with sweet potatoes for a while before we introduce squash and avocado.
After dinner Christian head out on a late night mountain bike ride. Cole, Chet, Alex and I headed out for a family walk. Baby in a stroller. Dog on his leash. Cole on his bike. We set off to explore the neighborhood. When we got home, Chet was ready for bed. I offered him nursing. He refused. After two ounces in a bottle, I could tell he was restless. He was trying to fall asleep but couldn’t find comfort in his bottle. Again I offered him my breast. This time he latched on. He nursed. HE NURSED. He nursed. He nursed for about fifteen minutes before he fell asleep in my arms. He was so relaxed. He looked so peacefully as he slept in my arms with his hand holding on to my breast.
I love nursing my baby. Not only am I providing him his nutrients to grow and thrive, but I have yet to find another moment in the day when I feel so connected to my baby. In those 15 minutes tonight, I felt him relax. I felt an ease find his body as if it was saying “there you are. I have missed you”. I feel like nursing my baby is setting the foundation for the rest of our relationship together. I hope I can always provide him the peace I saw him find tonight. I hope I can always put him at ease. I hope he never forgets the comfort he finds in his mama’s arms.
Sleep tight sweet baby. Today was everything I needed to feel renewed in my mission to nurse my baby.