When Should Winning Matter?

This spring Cole asked to play baseball. I was thrilled. He has never expressed an interest in playing sports. He has always shied away from trying new activities. Watching him grow and succeed on the ball field has put a smile on my face all spring. He’s become more confident. He’s becoming more comfortable in his own skin. He is learning to accept failure with grace (key word: learning!).

While I love being on the ball field cheering him on, I have to be honest….

I don’t love everything that surrounds childhood sports.

In order to be completely honest, let me start by disclosing that Cole’s team has never won a game. His coach stresses fun over winning. Cole is not the best player on his team. He is a very consistent player. He almost always hits the ball, but he has never hit a home run. He makes some awesome stops in the outfield, but has never caught a pop fly. The boy can also hustle. They call him wheels on his team. His heart is in the right place. He loves playing baseball. Maybe I would feel differently if he hit home runs and his team was undefeated, but I doubt it.

While Cole’s coach stresses fun, a good majority of the other coaches stress winning. In the past two games, I have witnessed the same coach cheat to benefit his own time (with a smirk on his face. He knew what he was doing). I have seen adults make mistakes (it happens), and the kids on the team be punished for the adult’s over site. I have watched coaches play sloppy baseball just to score.

I know the point of playing a game is to win, but at what cost? At what age does winning begin to outweigh good HONEST fun? Fortunately Cole is oblivious to all of this and he continues to smile through each game. As a mom on the sidelines it is very frustrating.

While I think it is important for these young boys to learn how to play proper baseball, an eight year old should not be called “out” after he runs home because his dad (and coach) patted him on the back as he rounded third base. A child should not be called “out” because his coaches sent out the wrong batter. I know it’s a fine balance. They need to learn the proper rules of the game, but these boys are 7 and 8 years old. Let them fall in love with the game of baseball.

I know that opinions on this topic are all over the place. This is just the opinion of one mom who thinks sports (and life) should be fun when you are eight years old. Winning isn’t the only thing in life that matters. The coaches (and a lot of the other kids on other teams) could learn a few life lessons from a team that hasn’t won a game all season but continues to show up, have fun, and love baseball.

Now I just have to learn to sit on the sidelines and not let the rest of the baseball world interfere with my love of watching my child fall in love with a sport.

Thank you Tasha for Sharing this with Me!

Big Changes for Baby Chet

Exactly one month ago, I had a feeling it was time to transition Chet out of his Mose’s basket into………well, into what? Did I want to move his pack-n-play into our room so he could continue to sleep in our room? Did I want to put him in his crib? Was I ready for him to be in his own room? How in the world was I going to get my itty bitty (way too big for his basket) baby to sleep in his wide open crib? I thought about it. I googled it. I asked friends for advice. And I did nothing.

Yes. He always sleeps with his face covered.

Chet started happily sleeping in his basket again. He started waking up once a night. I was terrified to make a change. I ignored the fact that the recommended age limit on the Mose’s basket is three months because it also has a weight limit of 20 lbs. And then I justified Chet staying in his basket until we went to the Great Wolf Lodge this weekend. I wanted him to sleep while we were at the hotel so I wouldn’t be exhausted while trying to play with Cole.

This past week, Chet started showing signs that he was ready for a new sleeping scenario again. He kept arching his back and trying to roll over to his side while he was in his basket. While he was sleeping, he would pull his knees into his chest and thump them back down. Over and over again. It woke me up just a few times! It woke him up a few times too. My baby who had fallen into a comfortable sleep pattern of only waking up once a night started waking up 2 or 3 times a night. I kept my fingers crossed that I could keep him comfortable in his basket until our weekend getaway.

Friday night at Great Wolf Lodge finally arrived. While Christian ran all over the hotel with both boys playing Magiquest for hours, I desperately tried to get Chet to sleep. He wanted nothing to do with is Mose’s basket. I rocked him. I paced the room with him. I wrapped him in a blanket. He didn’t want to sleep. In order to give my back a break, I laid him down on the bed. Within seconds, he passed out. Hello Mom. I’m ready for my crib.

Too cute not to share twice.

We got home from our getaway on Saturday evening. As bedtime approached, I knew it was time to make the switch. Change can be scary (for me at least). I didn’t want to go back nights of not sleeping. I was nervous about having my baby in another room. I dreaded the idea of having to walk down the hallway in the middle of the night to feed him. I was dragging my feet.

My first attempt to put him to bed resulted in a dirty diaper. Thirty minutes later, I tried again. After three cycles of music on his songhorse, Chet was sound asleep in his crib. I held my breath and waited for him to get restless. I anticipated that he would wake up soon after he fell asleep. He didn’t. As Christian and I went to bed, I hoped he wouldn’t wake up right after I feel asleep. He didn’t. I kept waking up, but I never heard my baby cry. I kept checking the baby monitor, and all I saw was a sleeping baby. Chet didn’t make a noise until 5:30am this morning. BEST NIGHT OF SLEEP since he was born. After he nursed, he went back to bed and slept until 8:45.

Today he napped in his crib.

And tonight he fell asleep in his crib after one cycle on his songhorse. I don’t know what tonight will bring, but I do know that I can finally return the Mose’s basket to my sister. We have transitioned to sleeping in the crib. What a fun way to kick off his fourth month of life.

(4 month photos coming soon!)

Another Birthday Celebration for Cole

Cole’s birthday celebrations carried over into this weekend. Instead of gifts, for the past few years we have taken Cole somewhere to celebrate his birthday instead. The first year we went to Baltimore to visit the Aquarium and the Science Museum. Last year we went to Great Wolf Lodge in Williamsburg. This year Cole wanted to visit Great Wolf Lodge again. The party kicked off Friday afternoon. We picked up Cole and his best buddy from school and headed straight to Williamsburg. The rest of Friday night and all day Saturday went by in a blur. It was filled with swimming, water slides, magiquest, and more swimming.Fun was had by kids of all ages, young and old.

The boys in their corner of the room
Must have been something good
First to bed. Last one to wake up.
One Fish. Two Fish.
Fun for the Husband
He loved the water too

And the cherry on top….we still have Sunday off before the work/school week begins!

 

I do!

Two years ago “We Did”. Today I would “I Do” all over again.

On our one year anniversary, I shared the story of how we meet. I still smile at the simplicity of our story. Boy sees girl (with a modern twist). Boy asks girl out. Boy and girl fall in love.

When I met Christian out for the first time ever, I honestly had no idea what to expected. I had no expectations. I was just starting a new chapter in my life, so if nothing else, I was looking forward to good company. As I drove to the Mexican restaurant, I had butterflies in my stomach. I wasn’t even sure what he looked like (Christian photographs “weird” – he rarely looks like himself in a photos). In some of his photos he was hot. In some of his photos he looked a little dorky. (Maybe he photographs perfectly. I do think my husband is hot, but he is also a little dorky!) When I pulled into the parking lot that evening, he was standing in front of the doors waiting for me.

“I love him”

Those three words fell out of mouth. They came out of no where. I actually laughed at myself after I said them. What in the world was I thinking?

Although I wasn’t in love with him yet (that surfaced ten minutes into our conversation), there was something about him that sent me over the moon. As we stared at each other over a beer and a margarita glass and talked about every possible subject that night, I knew there was something about him I couldn’t walk away from. For the first time in my life, I gave into to something that felt absolutely right.

I love you Christian! I can’t wait to “I do” a hundred times more!

Our Song!

Stop.

Sometimes you just have to stop what you are doing.

Stop: Take a break from a normal Friday night to celebrate one awesome eight year old

Friday night our house was filled with love, laughter, and a lot of happy birthdays. Grandparents, Aunt, Uncle, Cousins and Cole’s best friend joined us for a cook out and cake. The house was a buzz with noise and energy. Chet was a wonderful baby on Friday night. While everyone ate, Chet quietly went to sleep upstairs. After the grandparents and the rest of the family filed out, Cole and Conner played with glow sticks and spun circles in the back yard. It was true childhood fun.

Stop: Change running plans mid-run to take care of a tired pup and run home with a smile on your face

Saturday morning went by in flash. After debating between yoga and running, my running shoes won. Alex and I headed out to tackle a few miles through our neighborhood. Two and half miles from our house, Alex laid down in the middle of the road. He was done. He literally stopped us in our tracks. Eight hours of doggy daycare on Friday plus a house full of guests Friday night really wore him out. After running two and a half miles he needed to stop what he was doing. We took it easy on the last three miles of our run, and I let him drink all of my water. Although the run wasn’t what I had expected, Alex stopping me on the run put a huge smile on my face. I think I smiled and laughed the whole way home. We had to be a sight to everybody who went by: Woman running while her dog slowly follows behind her. Maybe I should have picked yoga.

(Side note: my husband ran 4 miles after I got home. Someone is starting to love running!)

Stop: You can’t fight mother nature

Before we knew it, Saturday morning was gone and it was time to head to the baseball field. As soon as we arrived, it started to rain. The rain didn’t let up. While the boys hid in the dug out, I drove circles around the block to keep Chet from waking up. Because the rain didn’t stop, the baseball game did. The game was cancelled.

Stop: Take off the mom and dad hat for the night and remember what it’s like to be husband and wife

Saturday night was date night for mama and papa. We are trying to commit to having a date night once a month. To keep us accountable and to force us to take a break from our mom and dad roles, I bought tickets to see The Avett Brothers in concert. Surrounded by friends and great music, Christian and I were able to stop being a mom and a dad and we were just husband and wife.  Mission Accomplished. We had a great night.

Stop: Take inventory of what is going on around you

Sunday morning came too quickly. Although both boys treated us to an 8am wake-up, my body still wanted another hour or two of sleep. We had another full schedule to tackle. Our families were meeting for lunch at 11:30. I had plans to tackle another run at 1:00. Before I could even get into go mode, Chet was quick to remind me that he needed some mama time. He fussed all morning. He refused to nap. He wanted to be in my arms while I paced the house.

It is times like this morning that I am reminded to be present in my current moment. My baby needed mama time. Although we had obligations to other people, there is nothing more important to me that the development of my children. At almost four months, these cries for nurturing are ones I do not want to ignore. Christian and Cole meet my family for lunch. I cancelled my running plans. Chet and I laid on the floor talking. We laid next to each other the whole time they were gone. He needed that. I needed that. After such a busy weekend, mom and baby reconnected on the simplest level. He was so happy to just look into my eyes.

Sometimes you just have to stop what you are doing. Sometimes you need to break away from your normal routine to enjoy simple childhood happiness. Sometimes you need to stop trying so hard to run further or faster. Sometimes it feels better to go slow and smile. Sometimes you need to take a break from being a parent so you can enjoy being a spouse. Sometimes you need to lay on the floor and stare at your baby for a few minutes or a few hours. Sometimes the best way to take care of yourself and those around you is to simply stop what you are doing and enjoy the moment you are currently living. Sometimes you just have to stop what you are doing.