Kristy Maute

Dream Big

Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss you’ll land among the stars

I had this quote hanging in my sports locker all through High School. I saw it before volleyball games and track meets. My teenaged-brained self thought it sounded cool. What teenager doesn’t want to conquer the world? I had big dreams and high hopes for my adult life. I knew I was going somewhere. While I know I dreamed of getting as far away from Virginia as I possibly could, I don’t ever remember dreaming of a life for myself. In elementary school, I wanted to be an architect. I drew house plans day and night. For Christmas my parent’s got me a drafting kit. In 10th grade I had to write a paper about my future career. I pick a flight attendant. I could fly for free! I honestly don’t think I ever dreamed about my life in the future – besides getting away from it all.

My senior year, the Dixie Chicks released their hit song “Wide Open Spaces”. I played that song like it was written for me. I sang that song at the top of my lungs while I drove around in my mom’s convertible and later my ugly green Nissan sentra! I needed wide open spaces.

Sing it with me! You know you want to!

Who doesn’t know what I’m talking about
Who’s never left home, who’s never struck out
To find a dream and a life of their own
A place in the clouds, a foundation of stone

Many precede and many will follow
A young girl’s dream no longer hollow
It takes the shape of a place out west
But what it holds for her, she hasn’t yet guessed

She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes

She traveled this road as a child
Wide eyed and grinning, she never tired
But now she won’t be coming back with the rest
If these are life’s lessons, she’ll take this test

She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes

As her folks drive away, her dad yells, “Check the oil!”
Mom stares out the window and says, “I’m leaving my girl”
She said, “It didn’t seem like that long ago”
When she stood there and let her own folks know

She needs wide open spaces
Room to make her big mistakes
She needs new faces
She knows the high stakes

Like every college kid should, I found my place in the clouds. I made lots of adult decisions, and I made a lot of adult mistakes. I learned a lot of life lessons. I found new faces. I searched for my place in the wide open spaces.

At the time, I felt like I was living the wrong life. I felt like I made a wrong choice. I had made a wrong decision. Now, at the ripe old age of 31, I know I was living my life. I had a lot of things I need to work through. I needed to reject elements of my life. I needed to stand up for myself. I needed to learn life lessons. I’m thankful that I demanded and clung to my independence. I’m glad I carved out a part of the world for myself so I could fail, fall down, get back up, succeed, and try again. I’ve failed again. I’ve succeeded again. What nobody ever told me was that I was never failing. I was learning. I was defining my space in this world.

The life lessons don’t stop once the foundation of stone is set. My space continues to need definition. Life changes. Lessons are no longer relevant or valid. What I know now, that I didn’t know when I was 20, is that life is one big success. What I did know in my 20s, that I sometimes forget in my 30s, is that I want to dream big. I don’t want to give up on the idea that I am and can live my dream life. We all deserve to dream big and to live big. What defines those dreams can become our reality.

I don’t dream of wealth or money or fancy houses. I dream of a home for my family. I dream of practicing yoga with my family around me. I dream of running races as my family cheers me on. I dream of teaching people that life is about dreaming big. I wish I could tell every 18 year old girl (and boy) that she can make her own dreams come true. Life is hard. Life can be ugly. But life is beautiful. I dream about planting seeds of hope in everyone that I meet. Pay it forward. Pass it on. My life is good. It’s not sugar-coated, and it’s not perfect. My life is real. It is happy. It’s about growing as an individual and raising my children to be successful adults. I want everyone to know that their life can be their form of happy too.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the dreamer that existed in me at 18. I think those dreams should have the dust blown off of them now that I have a foundation to build on. At 31, I think it’s time to make them more concrete. I think it’s time I gave them shape. As always, my mind is a buzz with how to make this happen. I plan on putting things on paper over the next couple of weeks, and then I plan on letting the puzzle pieces find their way to each other.

The best way I know how to live my life is to dream big, make a plan for the dreams, and let life run it’s course. I’m confident I’ll end up exactly where I’m supposed to be.

Thank you Tasha for letting me bounce some ideas off of you today and for inspiring me to revisit old dreams! And JT at Smile with your Heart for always planting seeds of inspiration in me!

Another 40 day goal accomplished

As I write this post, Christian just told me to look out the window. It’s 8:20, and it is completely dark outside. Summer is definitely coming to an end. I know a lot of people love summer months. I love Fall, Winter, and Spring. These hot summer months and I don’t always get along.

Set #4 of my 40 day goal challenge is also coming to an end. August 22nd is the last day of this set. One of my goals, that has been lingering since set #2, is to take Cole to kids yoga class. I finally signed him up. This week he is attending a Kid’s Yoga Camp at Bamboo Studios. It’s 3 hours every day. The class consists of yoga, arts & crafts, and community service.

Cole has been counting down the days until the start of this week. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so excited to go to camp. (shame on me for not getting him to the yoga studio before today). Cole loves yoga. He loves meditation. He LOVES crow pose and crane pose. He has some serious strength in the little body of his.

I don’t even know where to start with the benefits of yoga – yoga for kids, yoga for adults, yoga for pregnant ladies. I honestly can’t imagine our household without yoga. It gives Cole a sense of peace that balances out the side of him that needs to be perfect. It gives him a sense of accomplishment. It teaches him to be aware of himself, to be accepting of himself as he is today, and to encourage those around him. It teaches him patience. It teaches him to thrive in the quiet moments, to breathe his way into a comfort zone, and to relax. It teaches him to love the world around him.

This photo warms my heart! Cole heading to yoga!

Cole was all smiles when I picked him up! I got to the studio a few minutes early. The kids and the instructors were in the parking lot putting hearts on everyone’s car. They wrote notes of well wishes and have a nice days on each heart. What a great surprise to find on your car!

He was too tired to tell me about the camp when he got into the car, but all the fun facts started to slowly spilling out as the evening progress. He loved it! He’s ready for day 2 already!

100% Mental

Somewhere between the time I was given the okay to start running again, the double pink lines on the pregnancy test and today, my running has shifted from being physically challenging to being 100% mentally challenging. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still a physical challenge to keep going. My biggest struggle is pushing myself mentally. My biggest struggle is ignoring the whispers in my head to skip a run, slow down, or walk more. On the agenda today was an 11 mile run. With the cupcake party and the overwhelming thoughts of blue, my 11 mile run was the last thing I thought about this weekend. I woke up this morning, and I remembered it was my day to tackle a long run.

I wasn’t feeling it.

I ate the chocolate donut that was calling my name (not exactly the best food before a long run). It was followed by a kiwi and some orange juice. I checked my blog. I checked all my favorite blogs. I checked Facebook. I hit refresh on them all. I did anything to avoid putting on my running shoes.

I finally came to terms with the fact that nothing was happening in the computer world that would justify missing my run. As much as I didn’t feel like heading out, I knew I wasn’t willing to miss my long run. I got off the couch, I changed my clothes, and I set out for my run. As I was leaving, I told Christian I have never felt so mentally unprepared for a long run. Long runs are what I love. I struggle with 3 mile runs not 11 mile runs. He told me to do whatever felt good. He told me to come home after 5 if it just wasn’t happening today. As unprepared as I felt mentally, 5 was not an option. It was 11 miles today. The only other option was to run more.

Alex, my new running buddy, was by my side. As much as I didn’t want to take him with me, I knew the rest of the afternoon would be much more peaceful if he got a run in. He joined me for the first 3 miles of my run. I got two houses from my front door steps, and my garmin started making a lot of weird noises. Beep. Beep. Beep. Blank screen. My battery died.

I turned around now even more grumpy about my run. I gave my husband my garmin. I turned on endomondo on my phone. I tried again. Alex was incredibly hyper on my run (or maybe I was just incredibly grumpy). I didn’t feel like running. I didn’t feel like playing tug of war with my dog and his leash. I wanted my Garmin on my wrist. My grumpiness carried me through my run (not so successfully). I was mad at all of my neighbors who think electric fences around their front yard is a good idea. I was mad at their dogs for making my dog whimper and whine and get caught up under my feet. I was made at the other people out enjoying their day who had dogs on a leash who can’t behave. My right leg kept cramping up. I was mad at my leg. I was GRUMPY!

Since my Garmin was no longer working, I knew I wanted to run my 5k loop with Alex. After that I would run from our house to Christian’s parent’s house – exactly 4 miles from our street to their street. This would give me 11 miles. I wouldn’t need to dig my phone out of my camelbak every few miles to check my mileage.

I got back to my house at mile 2.75. I dropped off Alex. I used the bathroom. I drank some orange juice. I headed out again.

8+ more miles to go.

All of a sudden, I realized it was a beautiful day for running. It was overcast. There was an occasional light rain shower. I knew there was a chance of thunderstorms. Running in rain storms are my favorite runs. Maybe this run wouldn’t be so bad after all. As dark clouds rolled in, I made a quick phone call to Christian – Let me be if it’s raining. Come find me if there is lightning. If I wasn’t pregnant, I’d normally keep running through the thunder and lightning. I don’t think my SON would appreciate being hit by lightning though because his crazy mom likes to run in storms. (Fun Endomondo fact – Christian is my friend on their website. He can track my progress the entire way. If he has to find me, he can locate me on a map! Another fun Endomondo fact (that I didn’t know until after my run today) – Christian can sent me pep talks through their website and my phone. I had mine on vibrate today so I didn’t hear any of them. Darn!)

Favorite running path near Christian's parent's house

Around mile 5 something shifted in my mental attitude. My running felt strong. I felt good. I had settled into my run quite nicely. The rest of the run was smooth sailing. I love being able to call my belly HIM now on our runs. I love knowing that I’m out there, ~~getting passed by~~ running with all the other Sunday runners. I focused on my walking. I walked strong. I didn’t let myself fall back on to my heels when I came to a walk break.

I arrived back at my house at mile 11.26 to find my smiling husband on the front porch waiting for me. He’d been tracking me on Endomondo (don’t worry, he is the only person who can track me on their website. Any other way screams STALKER to me!)

For what started off as an awful, dragging my heels in the sand, grumbling at everything around me run turned into possibly my best run since being pregnant. I finished my run in 2:36:36. This time includes a 5 minute warm-up walk, the dozen of dog pee breaks during the first portion, and the dog drop off/potty break. I think my running splits say it all. After I dropped Alex off, my mile times are drastically better than they have been in the past few weeks. On paper, my overall pace is slower than last week, but that is including all the non-running factors due to the fact that I was using my phone instead of my garmin.

1 – 14:29 (including 5 minute warm-up walk)

2 – 14:22 (Not sure what happened here? Grumpy much!)

3 – 19:48 (Dog drop-off/potty break)

4- 13:32

5- 12:52

6 – 12:02

7 – 13:12

8 – 13:24

9 -13:02

10 – 13:25

11 – 12:48

Last .25 – 3:33

All Done! (still not looking obviously pregnant in my running clothes - darn!)

In order to break the 3 hour mark for the Rock n Roll half-marathon, I need to keep my mile pace below 13:40. Do I dare say I think I’m going to run the half-marathon in less the 3 hours (at nearly 24 week pregnant!). I think it’s safe to say I will be close if everything goes well over the next 3 weeks. Do you see all those miles in the 12s listed above? 12:02! Hello! I haven’t seen that in the middle of a long run in a long time!

Today’s run is exactly why I LOVE running longer distances. Had I given in to my grumpiness and stopped before mile 5, I would have ended my run feeling grumpy and defeated. Since I was running 11 miles, I had 6 more miles to enjoy the runner’s high I was searching for during the first 5 miles.

Today’s run is exactly why I set goals and create training plans for myself. I hold myself accountable to the goals I set for myself. I don’t back down from goals and training plans. No matter how much I didn’t want to run today, I am so glad I did. I’m one step closer to completing a half-marathon while I’m pregnant.

Today’s run is exactly why I don’t let weather, lack of sleep, or any other condition determine my ability to be successful. I’m in charge of my mood, my level of determination, and my ability to find success in life.

Thank goodness for every single mile during today’s 11 mile run – the good ones and the grumpy ones! I was able to run through the lack of motivation and the grumpy to find a feeling of pride and even more motivation to keep going!

It’s a…………

I have a quick confession to make before I make the Big Announcement. We found out on Thursday during our ultrasound. We may or may not have pretend to not know so people wouldn’t ask us too many times. We tend to crack under pressure!

It’s a……………

BOY!!!!!

Let’s just say my mom instincts were WAY OFF with this baby. Let’s hope that isn’t true for the rest of HIS little life.

Boy oh Boy oh Boy………WE ARE HAVING A BOY!

Such a surprise!

We decided to find out on Thursday during the ultrasound for a few reasons. The big reason is because I tend to be a very quiet emotional person. I have a hard time processing emotions in front of other people. I knew the news, boy or girl, would be emotional for me. Christian is also a very emotional person. He has no problem shedding a tear or two (even over commercials!). I also knew it would be a special moment for Cole. We thought it would be best for us me to find out privately. This was all decided in the car on the way to the doctor’s office.

Our ultrasound technician is absolutely amazing. They way she told us was absolutely perfect. I couldn’t have come up with a better way myself. As Cole was listing all the baby body parts, the technician came to our baby’s hiney. Cole asked if it was the baby’s butt. She said, “It sure is your BROTHER’S butt.” It probably took a good 30 seconds for any of us to realize what she had just said. Cole is getting his wish. He is having a brother! I’m so grateful and thankful to the technician for telling Cole. It was his tiny moment with his brother before the rest of the world knew the good news.

After the 30 seconds past, I immediately started crying. Christian was crying. Cole couldn’t stop smiling. We are having a little boy!

All of our family gathered today at my in law’s house today. I quickly confessed that we knew. We kicked off our yummy lunch with the best appetizer ever…….CUPCAKES. Christian, Cole and I got to sit back and watch everyone take a big bite of their cupcake. Blue icing for everyone! It was great to see the look on everyone’s face! Needless to say, everyone is thrilled. The Maute name lives on (first Maute grandson). It looks like my sister is in charge of the girls for our side of the family, and I’m in charge of the boys.

My friend Morgan out did herself. The cupcakes were absolutely adorable. Not only were they cute, they tasted amazing. Thank you so much Morgan!

Now that Maute Moo is officially a Mister Maute Moo (technically a Bull! Thank you Kerrie for yet another great cow reference! She gets 100% of the credit for naming Maute Moo), I know everyone is dying to know…..

Do we have a name yet?

Simple answer. No.

We had a girl name ready to go. (sigh! It was such a great name). We have a few boy names we like but nothing we are in love with. We will try a few on for size over the next few months. Fingers crossed he will have a name by the time he leaves the hospital!

(lots of pictures to post on Facebook tonight! Come find me there if you aren’t already my friend to see more!

Finally signed-up

From baby news to running news……….and I promise I will be back tomorrow before bedtime to share even more baby news! One more day of guessing! Boy or Girl!

I have actually woke up the past 2 mornings to go for my morning run! Hooray for small miracles. Yesterday I ran 3 miles. Today I ran about 2.5 (I forgot to charge my Garmin). Yesterday’s run was a little stiff, but today I felt great. I ran the entire time minus a potty break for Alex. I have no idea how fast I was running or how slow. I think I might leave my Garmin at home during the week for the rest of my pregnancy. Okay. Who am I kidding? I won’t leave it at home, but I might just change the screen so I can only see the actual time. I can go over mile times when I get home.

I’m definitely not following my training plan during the week. (Do not do as I do if you want to run a half-marathon). I think I’m lucky that my plan is working for me. I’ve modified it A LOT due to my pregnancy. I’m not stress about week day runs, but I am making sure I get my miles in on the weekend. My plan is really something like this – aim for running 3 days during the week. Be happy if you get in 1 or 2. Don’t beat yourself up if you miss them all. Run the scheduled amount on the weekend. If I hurt, it’s because I didn’t run during the week. I walk when my body gets tired. I tell my brain to be quiet when it tries to trick me into walking. I drink LOTS and LOTS of water. I don’t care about mile pace. I do try to avoid letting the overall mile pace get above 14 minutes (when I’m walking).

My goal heading into this weekend run is to walk better. I noticed last weekend that when I stopped to walk, I was walking like I was finished. It’s hard to tell your body to start again when your posture and pace are already finished. I might be walking, but this weekend I’m going to walk faster and more determined. My walk was slightly defeated last weekend.

I currently have a 9 mile run schedule for this weekend, but I’m bumping up my 11 mile run. I’m going for 11 this weekend. This is again my attempt to avoid that mid-week 12 mile run. 11 miles this week. 12 miles the following weekend. Then 6 miles. AND THEN……..13.1. The Rock n Roll Half- Marathon on Sunday, September 4th. This lofty goal of mine to run the half marathon while pregnant is actually going to come true (knock on wood). I’m injury free, and I have a baby on board! I can’t wait for race day!

Oh and I took the leap of faith. I officially registered for the race. I’d been holding out because I wasn’t sure if my body would let me continue. (KNOCK ON WOOD) I’m 3 weeks and 2 days away from day race day. I know a lot can change in 3 weeks when you are pregnant, but I’m feeling confident. My body feels great. My pregnancy is thriving. I might just have a shiny new race medal around my neck after all!

For those of you who were wondering about my nutrition/calorie consumption concerns I posted about earlier this week, I asked my doctor yesterday. She told me to eat like I normally eat before and after runs (pregnant or not pregnant). I’ve gained 15 lbs so far this pregnancy. She doesn’t have any concerns about me burning too many calories.