Poor Chet. He is going through so many baby changes right now. After he went down to bed last night at 6:45pm, he woke up again at 8pm…and 10:30, 11:00, 11:30, 1:30, 4:00, 5:30, and finally stayed awake at 7:30. Whew. I wish on nights like last night he could find comfort sleeping in our bed, but he doesn’t. Instead I drag my exhausted body to his room, to our nursing chair, nurse for 15+ minutes each time, and then drag myself back to bed. Repeat. Six Times. When he woke up cheery eyed and smiling this morning…he was covered in poop. As I stripped off his clothing, he smiled some more, and I was treated to the first viewing of what is about to be his third tooth.
I stayed home from work again.
Although exhausted, I was craving a run. I skipped a run with friends last night because mommy instincts told me Chet was about to have a rough night. I didn’t want to be far away if he needed to nurse to comfort himself back to sleep.
Tired. Heavy. Exhausted. But Eager. I headed out to “just run” with my faithful running partner, Alex. I didn’t care about pace or distance. I just needed a moment to reconnect.
The first half mile was a struggle. My legs were heavy. My entire body felt weighted. Alex was a little too eager to run. My brain was a little too busy.
Absent of music (my new favorite way to run) my mind can wander from what to cook for dinner (chicken with sautéed tomatoes, basil, okra, green peppers and black beans over brown rice if you are wondering. All from our CSA box except the chicken, black beans and rice) to hoping I can find time to practice yoga to finally finding comfort in nothing at all. Once I found my breath and the quiet place inside my head, the rest of the run fell perfectly into place.
Thursday’s yoga practice is restorative. It’s slow. It flows. One breath per movement. I consciously choose to carry this with me today on my run (in case I didn’t find time for my yoga mat).
At mile 1.5 Alex and I found ourselves next to the Lynnhaven River. The wildlife also seemed to be taking in what was left of yesterday’s beautiful weather before the 110 degree weather hits today. A blue egret (or is it a heron. Husband – chime in!) was playing in the water. Each of his movements was deliberate, graceful. Every time he lifted his foot and leg out of the water, he placed them back down with a purpose. I can run like that. I can live my life like that. Deliberate actions. Graceful mannerisms. Living life with a purpose. My run got a little bit lighter.
Along with the beautiful views, the river also treated us to a refreshing wind. Every few minutes a surprise cool gust of wind came rushing off the water. It felt like kissing my husband on our wedding day – I went back for a second kiss!. I would have gone back for more wind if I could controlled the weather. The wind blew the blossoms off the crape myrtle trees. The world was hosting a ticker-tape parade for my run. The rest of the day seemed a little bit easier.
Hot summer sun. A breeze off the water. A beautiful reminder of how I want to live each and every single one of my days. All it took was three miles to reconnect with myself and the world around me. I arrived back home oblivious of the fact that I didn’t sleep last night (or the two nights prior). I was greeted at the door with a happy baby (who was now wearing a shirt that said “One day I’ll run like Mommy” because he pooped again), a supportive husband, and a bouncing eight year old who was eager to confirm that we would be making our Olympic cookies tonight.
My face quickly turned into a smile.
And I did find time for my yoga practice during Chet’s very long morning nap.